SUPERUSELESS SUPEROWER: TeleKinnearsis
Pretty much everyone wishes they could move objects with their mind. Pretty much no one wishes that the only object they could move is actor Greg Kinnear.
SUPERUSELESS SUPERPOWER: Brow-Wow
The power to grow one's uni-brow at twice the normal human speed. Whereas mere mortals have to groom their brow on a weekly basis, those with this uncanny ability have the pleasure of grooming, uh? twice a week?